When I Lost One for the Team
I stood before the tribunal
of unsmiling judges. Having completed the debate competition was hard enough,
to now face their criticism was worse.
My teammate and I had argued our case
about America’s broken welfare system against a formidable twosome.
Now the four of us had to
stand and listen to why we’d won or lost. To say it was humbling is mild.
The
judges could tell us we were sloppy in our presentation, or worse, that our
arguments were unfounded—a polite way of saying that we were blowing smoke and
didn’t know what we were talking about.
You couldn't fool the judges—they could shoot holes in your logic, and expose any shoddy research.
Sweat was sliding down my
back as it became my turn to hear their critique. Later, I would wonder why
this was something I enjoyed doing, but for now, I respectfully stood and
listened.
Tapping a pen on the score sheet in front of him, one of the judges impaled me with glaring eyes. Thoughts raced through my mind. How could I have done so bad? What had I said that had met with such obvious disapproval?
I sensed the other competitors looking at me—probably thankful they weren’t getting the evil eye.
“Young lady, may I suggest
that if you hope to be successful in oral arguments, you learn how to disagree,
without being so disagreeable.”
I nodded slightly and waited
for more. However, he shook his head, scribbled on my score card and allowed
his look of disapproval to sear itself into my mind.
As I scroll through the
political posts on social media I’m reminded of those three judges. It’s never
been easier to be caustic in sharing opposing views.
But the lesson I learned
long ago is still true today—being disagreeable is an easy way to lose the
debate, and far worse, lose friends.
The truly wise person restrains his words,
and the one who stays calm is discerning.
Proverbs 17:27
The truly wise person restrains his words,
and the one who stays calm is discerning.
Proverbs 17:27