Showing posts from September, 2010

Watching what I say

Consider this: women talk about 3 times as much as men—about 20,000 words per day. Gives me a chance to say exactly whatever I think and feel. With thousands of words at my disposal, I’m just as likely to say things that I probably shouldn’t.
My challenge this week has been to become more sensitive about my words. What am I really saying? Can I offer more words of comfort? How about words that bring hope? Am I building up or tearing down?
But what I really need is a bit tougher: words of wisdom. Having wisdom means that I can know what to say and when to say it. Wisdom can lead me to make a good decision, not have to recover from a bad one, and maybe help others to do the same.
Wisdom comes with a higher price tag. Having information isn’t the problem; it’s knowing what to believe that’s tricky. I can research anything with the click of the mouse. But is that wisdom?
God’s wisdom always wins. Bible story after Bible story details the bad choices or the good ones. But having Godly wisd…

Being alone while being married

I was “single” this week due to my hubby’s business trip. In our thirty plus years, these trips are fairly rare. Yet, each separation gives me the chance to be alone. I love marriage. I love my husband. But being alone this time challenged me.
To get married is a choice. Thom and I lovingly chose one another and we've always wanted to stay together. But what was the cost of that choice? I believe that all choices have a cost. For me, I was able to “do my thing” while raising kids and managing the home front. My cost? I don’t think it was much. I was doing what I wanted.
Thom’s cost was far more expensive. Throughout our decades, there have been things he had to place on the shelf. He loves music. He’s a songwriter and a true performer at heart. His dream went on the shelf long ago. How much did that cost? I guess I’ll never know.
We all have dreams. I guess a better word would be “aspirations”. And we hope to be able to reach those goals. I always wanted to be a mother. Check. I a…

Facing the Hardest Realities

This has not been an easy week for some special people in my world. In life’s roulette, they or people they love are dealing with cancer. It makes me want to scream, “How many more need to suffer?” Being face to face with a debilitating disease ranks near the top for bad news. A test result changes life irrevocably.
When someone close to us suffers, it challenges us too. Medical battles are fought and we celebrate the wins. We regroup and pray harder with the disappointments. Answered prayers mean we’ve been granted more time.
Whether cancer or car accidents, life is evaluated differently within hospital corridors. As we gaze into the eyes of loved ones, we look at time differently. It has become an altered world with a clock whose hands don’t move normally. Waiting room couches don’t offer comfort, nor do the chairs pulled close to bedsides.
We want things the way they used to be. But truly, even without cancer, life is never the same as we journey forward. Life changes things. Cert…

Reflecting on my strategy

Here’s my usual routine: I make a plan, plunge in headfirst, do everything in my power to make it work, and then I wait. The waiting is the hardest part. Sometimes it seems like life is on hold while I wait. Why must something that is so right have to wait so long to happen? There’s no easy answer.
I have waited for some of my plans to work out that never do. Then other times things happen that I didn’t plan. Both situations challenge me.
In my 20’s, when facing many critical, life-altering choices, I had everything figured out. I absolutely knew what needed to happen. I knew my plans would work. But I waited & waited to see it happen. In the darkness of failure, I was humbled…. repeatedly.
Yet, I revisited my plan-making ability as a parent. Once again, I formulated what needed to happen in my children’s lives. Even when they were older, I KNEW what was best for them. I reasoned that I had the wisdom they probably lacked. And again I waited for MY plans to work.
I still struggle …